Transexual Conundrum

I want to post about something that came up in discussion today between me, my elder sister and my mother. It was concerning a transitioning/transitioned person about whom my sister had received a letter at work. I only know the person second hand so I don't know if they have fully transitioned but I will refer to the person as female because that is the gender identity she identifies with, in my eyes that makes her female. I will refer to the person before transitioning as he. Names have been changed for obvious reasons.

So, the subject came up that my sister's workplace had received a letter stating that Steven Smith should now be referred to as Stephanie Smith as they were trans. Steven had worked at the workplace some time ago as a manager, before my sister's time, but several staff knew him well.  Anyway, my sister knew him well enough to say hello and call him by name.

A discussion ensued between the staff as how to act if Stephanie came in when one staff member stated something. She said that she would ignore Stephanie. Obviously people were horrified and started to round on her. The person then said "Well, I knew Steven really well, and his whole family, but I don't know Stephanie at all. I've never met her. Why should I talk to her differently from any other client who uses these premises?".  It is this that caused the discussion at home. We all agreed that, in theory, if Steven was now Stephanie then effectively Steven was dead. Stephanie was a new person therefore should be treated as such until she introduced herself and/or asked for people to treat her as if she was Steven but with the obvious change.

How would other people react in a situation? I know I have a few friends that have transitioned or identify with a gender they weren't born with and I would never refer to them by their old name. However, I have not been in the situation where someone has effectively said that one person is 'gone' and a new one totally replaced them.  They have 'merely' changed sex, (I have to apologise for that terminology as I know transitioning isn't easy at ALL! It takes a lot of balls for a man to become a woman and a woman who becomes a man has more balls than a non-trans man will ever have!).

So, comment away please, I'd be interested to find out your thoughts. Please share it around too.

Daniel

Keeping Puppies

This was meant to be a gardening blog but that fell by the wayside. I'm not really healthy enough at the moment to do the serious gardening that is required so I've decided to use it for other musings.

One thing I've been thinking about lately is the way I'm living my lifestyle. I used to have a kennel, and by that I mean I had two guys who used to look upon me as their owner.  We were very close, so close that the two pups even started going out after a while, didn't work too well given they were both bottoms.

I miss it to be honest, not necessarily the sex but the closeness of it all. I used to like being there for them, as both an owner and a big brother figure. It eventually went sour due to me having an accident and not being able to be there for them, I therefore gave them their freedom.

I want something similar again, I would love to act as that father / big brother figure to a guy, or guys, and have the closeness that comes with it. I'm not feeling exceedingly top at the moment so anal may not be available at all times, I only like topping guys I'm completely comfortable with anyway as I see it as something very special. I am unusual in that I let my pups top me, if that is something they want to do. I don't see it as showing weakness or submission as I'm still in control.

I want a boy to lie with his head on my lap, to come to me for advice and comfort, to know that he is loved.  I don't do rules as such, I rely on trust, which works both ways. All I ever ask for is that everybody, myself included, plays completely safe outside the kennel (if they want to play outside).  That is a level of safety over and above what normally is needed, for example, I'd advise condoms for oral sex (giving and receiving). Regular testing is also sensible.

Maybe it's too much to ask for these days, but I can live in hope.

Gothy

The Beginning

Right, erm, time to begin I guess.  I've just got in from the garden after a quick check up to see what's happening between torrential rain and thunderstorms.  Not that I'm complaining, I was getting tired of watering everything like I have been since March!

On the whole things are coming along well, weeds aren't too bad but I bet the rain helps them shoot away.  There's lots of things I didn't expect have come up as a result of cultivating the soil for the first time in years.  Some beautiful white Spanish hyacinth have put in an appearance everywhere, along with celandines in the rose bed.  Most surprising was the four morelles that seem to have sprung up.  How or why I should have these is anyone's guess but they may have come in with the bark mulch for the paths!  Maybe if I leave them I can start a business next spring!

I need to get some photos off my phone and camera onto here if I keep this up.  We shall see.